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(2 comments | comment) am i on? [25 Oct 2007|11:59pm] im so tired of being sad. im so tired of crying every night and feeling alone every second of my life. im not saying this for pity or .. anything. i dont know how else to let it all out without cutting or tweaking my brains out. so . here. this is my attempt to obtain some sanity. ... how did i end up here? oh god i am so thankful for cash. more than anyone can ever possibly know. but why did it have to be anthony he is on his way to being peter and.. i just cant take another slap or put down .. all of it. why didnt i get out before why did i have to tweak every waking moment of my life why does his family see me as the bad one why am i alone now

(6 comments | comment) [23 Feb 2006|10:21am] damn. i thought lj had pretty much died, thats why i didnt care that it wasnt friends only anymore. i posted that thing the other day, and daniel says yesterday "can you explain something? why do people think we are having a baby together..." wat the heck? he said his twin told him he heard that from some girl. HUH?? that doesn't make any sense. well im going back to friends only. im not keeping everyone either so comment if you want to be added. <333

(2 comments | comment) [06 Jul 2005|10:50am] daniel left for las vegas about 30 seconds ago and i already miss that crazy guy. the other night when my mom and i were fighting, she said i wasn't allowed to talk to anyone or go see daniel eiher. i told him that. at 1AM there was a knock at my window... it was him. i actually snuck out to sit outside in his car for the next 2 hours.. not to fight with him, but to talk to my sister. she had called him and i finally got a chance to talk to her. you kno it's bad when you have to sneak out to have a conversation with your own sister. we talked about everything... aunt carmen, therapy, how it is like without mom, tristan who is walking now.. everything. daniel and i saw her, robert and tristan yesterday. i tried to bring cara but she went to her friend's house and i didn't see her again. my mom is real nice to me now after kicking me out. ahh. the crazy shit. mayra and i are going to feel so weird... chris,jairo,daniel and karem are all going to vegas for work!! WE SUCK BECAUSE WE ARE STILL 17 AND CAN'T WORK WITH THEM! sally didn't come over again to plan NY shit. im so over that with her. if im going.. ill do it myself. <3 and i had a fun phone conversation late last night. it made me smile. i heart shandy. i miss daniel.

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